We didn't start the fire

This is not my story. This did not happen to me. But when you (you know who you are) called to tell me about it, I had to share it with the world. And stories are always best told in the first person. Also, since we just talked for about ten seconds, I am adding in details. Why? Because this is how I imagine it happening.

Ahem.

So, I was at this singles party. And I was having a really good time, talking to this cute boy. I wasn't really paying attention to my surroundings, trying to make eye contact and look seductively through my eyelashes. I laughed at something he said, and leaned cutely against the wall behind me. Thirty seconds later, I smelled something funny. Cute boy looked up at me, his eyes widened, and he grabbed for the nearest curtain, throwing it over my head to quell the flames bursting forth from my hair. After he'd successfully put the fire out by smacking me in the head a few times, I finally noticed that I'd leaned into a menorah. It's alright, though. For the rest of the night I got to introduce myself to everyone as the hottest girl in the room.

To you, I grant limitless points. Ten just won't suffice. I don't think even 100 will do it. You have as many as you want.

Good work!